I never thought it would be so hard to just speak about what I find beautiful about someone. Most people expect others or even put the pressure on themselves to seem extremely smart and all deep when It comes to spotting the non-sexual attractions. During this quarantine period, I was doing a 30-day challenge, and I think it was day 5 where one had to mention a non-sexual attraction, so I go on and mention what I wanted; a man who looks Good, smells Good, blah blah. And a friend comments that ” with no offense I think you are all being fake and cliché,” and what ticked me off was him saying, ” your a writer i need to feel the depth and all. “honestly I’ll never forget this, I kept wondering, how and why!? Was it because I seemed familiar or rather similar to other girls ‘likes of what they want in a boy or man. Was I wrong to speak up!? So as you read this and you are having the same classic mentality that I am going to be deep and different, just don’t proceed.
My understanding of non-sexual attractions, is those beautiful striking things that get you absorbed in Someone, whether if it’s mentally, or a certain look on one’s face. It’s one of those things that get you sinking into someone, craving for more, but not sexually. They just get your mind involved, your pulse little unstable, and your soul on fire.
Most times the non-sexual attractions draw to more our personal relations and likes or even dislikes, I mean through hobbies, food, wine, literature, accent, how one’s face is formed, how the eyes roll, how they hold their cheek, or their love for history, the car they drive, their scent. So many things that are non sexual can lead us into falling for someone. And honestly we differ, with different tastes comes different flavours.
But then again there is a twist to this. Most times, the boys are meant to fall for someone on sight and yet the girls are said to take their time. And this is partially true, but at a certain point the parties tend to evolve and outgrow their heart’s way of loving. The boys start to notice more and the girls start to take on their prey on sight.
Honestly times are changing, in a world where we seek pleasure more and acknowledgement and popularity, I guess we have to know our partners past their sex preferences. Small inner things that ignite strong bonds and let’s leave the sex to be a dessert honestly. What’s the rush, do you badly need a wife or a husband who you’ll run to for money or sex and not know what they really are, and not know what to talk about when you are in a room together.
But lets not put so much weight and condemn ourselves for not having known better, there is time to explore, and take on what our hearts long for. Normally people would say look deeper and search, there is Not much to see in yourself, it’s always the best things other people have to offer that make the greatest change.
It’s nice looking out for what you want but people will not always give you all that you want and Desire.. but sometimes what they have could be more beautiful and better.