“Don’t take it too personal, no feelings or strings attached, he or she means Nothing, you don’t have to think about that in the moment, c’mon your boring, commitment is tiring, I don’t like your rants about relationships, I just like your vibe…” All I see are ways to just avoid responsibility and loyalty. So many people throw around these comments and I mean a lot. And Sometimes, I hope for better but then it comes up, over and over again.
Let’s start with hidden intentions.A lot of people hide what they actually want from someone. It’s easy to talk to an interesting stranger who seems really drawn to who you are. They’ll ask about your hobbies, your likes, what your putting on, your mental health. Some things are just too good to be true. And it’s easy to get drawn into someone who seems to actually care. But once you push it to the emotions, turns out you are too deep for their own taste. Meanwhile some might get engaged in deep talks but only to find out that they are a dead end. I mean some are stuck on their ex, are terrified of commitment or are bitter and are not willing to give it all to you but they are willing to submit their dick or vagina.
Yes, I won’t lie, many of us put ourselves in these situations, casually! “We are just flirting, it’s not a big issue, it’s just sex, we don’t do much anyway, she gives me attention, he gives me money,” Whatever your reason is casual sex or being a side chic isn’t a light issue nor is it fancy. Especially when there is so much hope on your end. And once, it turns out that you are on that end that gives and the other keeps taking and receiving, it’s definitely going to wear you out. I have said it before, sex or the attention or the loyalty you are putting in requires your mind, body and soul. And once it’s not reciprocated, honey, your definitely going to feel the war between your rational self and your emotions trying to strike a balance.
but it’s also the one way in which we can avoid dealing with real problems or issues or responsibilities that come with a relationship. Our generation is open about it, but that doesn’t mean that casual sex wasn’t there before. I mean what do you think people call the woman that’s not officially married to a known married man in your village. It doesn’t change a thing even though she has bore his children and he is taking care of them.
You know at a young age, it’s very easy to hide such a secret, even some married men do it but the most hurtful bit about this, is that when that man dies, you will not be recognised as his widow, you will not sit close to his coffin in the open. His family might not like you, there is so much that follows casual sex and that means you might not be apart of a family and you turn out to be the second thought, the home wrecker, the out cast.
And it grows on you, even though he professes his love every day to your ears, no one else will know nor will they care cause he didn’t visibly show it.
we are all tainted at a point. And emotion isn’t a sin. And we shouldn’t bring in the daddy issues all the time. Sometimes, we are our own problem. So maybe just maybe, we should keep it strictly casual